Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I understand how hurricane paths work

Why do flat-Earthers think the Earth is flat?

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I can count

Why do men love swallowing more then women? Is it just because women just don't try eating CUM? they be missing some delicious CUM.. Life is short and women are missing out of lots of enjoyment..

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I know who the president of Turkey really is

Social Security's 2026 COLA Has an Unpleasant Surprise in Store for Retirees - The Motley Fool

I don’t buy bullshit

I have complete contempt for fakery

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

We Asked 3 Chefs the Secret to the Best Potato Salad—They All Said the Same Thing - EatingWell

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

Scientists visualize key protein structures linked to immune response and inflammation - Phys.org

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

Why do people think Justin Bieber is worse than Joseph Stalin?

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I actually pay taxes

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

How do police officers feel about the fear they instill into criminals?

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

Why do I feel bad when I see white girls dating black guys, am I racist?

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

Why is the world male-dominated?

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I have a reading level above third grade

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

Hackers take aim at Washington Post journalists in an apparent ‘targeted’ cyberattack - CNN

I can read

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

What exactly is the difference between a surge protector and a fuse? Can a fuse protect the electronic devices from lightning instead of surge protector?

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I don’t cotton to rapists

Why am I so afraid that gun owners have set traps to kill me outside my house or my car?

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I have complete contempt for traitorism

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

Costco opens a whole new kind of store - TheStreet

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

Why do I sweat so much? I’m 17 but I feel like I always need to re-apply deodorant and I am always self-conscious that I smell because I feel sweat under my arms.

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I see through liars

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink